Of all the absurd things in the world...

I recently discovered that our fearless leader, President George W. Bush himself, is speaking at my alma mater's commencement ceremony this spring. Can I even begin to tell you how much my skin crawled? I remember when his father spoke there; my brother cut high school and went with my mom to see it. I was young and fascinated by the fact that someone like the present would visit such a dinky, not-so-important school. The university has sunken into the mire of money and money and more money. The school's president, one of the most uncharismatic people I've ever seen, is so far up the Big Donator's ass that he isn't even UP Big Donator's ass anymore. The esteemed school president is threatening the paper's editorial board with extreme censorship and some graduates are debating other whether or not to attend or if they should protest.

The glorious coming of the high speed internets to our home today was overshadowed by the loss of our cable connection* and the fact that our credit ratings aren't good enough to qualify for Dish Network. We keep up with payments, we do have credit but apparently it's not good enough for DN. Those bastards. But our high speed internets are lovely and fast and my computer and laptop are both up-to-date.

But I miss watching television, which is a sad commentary on my life. I mean, I knew before this that I watch too much TV but I am seriously addicted, people. How am I supposed to watch AC 360? How am I supposed to watch Every Woman Soledad O'Brien in the morning whilst I iron my work clothes? How am I supposed to get my news from The Daily Show if I can't see Comedy Central? Our lives are miserable. Miserable and cableless.

Oh, the things about which we complain.

*Our magical, mysterious cable access was disconnected by the technician who installed the internets